Thursday, November 5, 2009

PSA: Just Say No.

The holidays are looming large ahead of us. That means celebration, festivity, and frolic.* And as always, when we gather with friends, there's always the possibility of temptation, of doing something that we know we'd later regret.

So when your host opens that drawer and pulls out its contents, it's perfectly natural to want to go along, to not be the party pooper.

But this is not the time for comity or compromise of principle. As your friends and loved ones plunk down on the sofa, ready to take in the offered contraband, it is time to take your stand.

Warn them.

Stop them any way you can.

Under no circumstances can you call yourself a friend if you let them watch The Star Wars Holiday Special.

I'm serious. There are good movies, bad movies, so-bad-they're-good movies, and awful movies. Then there is The Star Wars Holiday Special in its class of one, where we can only dream of it being merely awful. If the dread Necronomicon came with a dvd insert, the first selection on the menu would be The Star Wars Holiday Special.

I have come back from that dark land, where Bea Arthur tends bar at Mos Eisley, and where Harrison Ford joins the final sing-along at the end looking like he wants nothing more than for a very heavy set piece to fall on him, to warn you.

Don't do it.
* - Whether you want to or not. FROLIC, DAMMIT!